


Tears Of Insecurity

by xNamikaze



Category: SHINee
Genre: Angst and Hurt/Comfort, Boyfriends, Established Relationship, Fluffy Ending, Insecurity, Inspired by Fanfiction, Jongyu, M/M, Past Relationship(s)
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2019-01-18
Updated: 2019-01-18
Packaged: 2019-10-11 22:15:11
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,750
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/17455274
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/xNamikaze/pseuds/xNamikaze
Summary: A birthday party goes wrong when Jjongs insecurity raises to the surface. Are there still feelings between Jinki and Joon?





	Tears Of Insecurity

**Author's Note:**

> English is not my first language!
> 
> This is my first attempt at writing angst! ╥﹏╥

 

 

Jonghyun tightened his fists in his lap, jaw set, eyes never leaving the scenery outside.

 

The silence in the car was highly uncomfortable, at least for the party behind the wheel. Jinki sat next to him, nervous and occasionally looking sideways at him as he drove the car back to their shared apartment.

 

He was confused as to why Jonghyun was so angry with him. The younger man had practically demanded to leave Joon's birthday party at the club earlier and even went so far as to drag him towards their car.

 

The whole car ride, Jinki had tried to strike up a conversation with Jonghyun, wondering what was bothering his boyfriend but he had stayed stubbornly silent. Jinki decided to leave it be until they were home, in the meantime, he thought about what the reason could be for his lover to act this way.

 

They had stepped into the club and congratulated Joon on his birthday. Their friend had rented the whole club for the occasion and had invited Jinki, his ex-boyfriend and his new lover Jonghyun to the party.

 

Jinki had assured Jjong that he would be with him soon as he wanted to catch up with Joon. As Jonghyun walked off to entertain himself, Jinki and Joon had talked about life and their future. An hour or so later, Jonghyun had come up to them, angry and demanding to go home.

 

Jinki sighed and peeked over at his lover, curiosity and worry eating away at him.

 

~*~

 

As they stumbled into their apartment, Jonghyun struggled silently out of his jacket and kicked his shoes off, cursing as he flapped furiously in his jacket.

 

''Jjong, are you okay?'' Jinki asked concerned. No response came from the shorter man and as he was about to walk off, Jinki grabbed his wrist.

 

''What happened?'' Jinki asked annoyed, he wasn't going to let the composer walk away without an explanation. “Did something happen at the party?” He didn't want Jjong to suffer when he was here to comfort him. The smaller male always wanted to be reassured and didn't like to be left alone.

 

Jonghyun sighed and turned around, the other man nearly stumbled back as he saw watery eyes and a trembling lip. Jinki felt his heartbreak as he quickly cupped his lover's cheeks, brushing the first tears away. ''Baby, please don't cry,'' he whispered softly, ''tell me what happened Jjong...'' He repeated the question almost in a panic, fearing something terrible had happened.

 

His lover looked everywhere but at him as he licked his lips. ''Do you still love me?'' His voice came out small and unsure.

 

Jinki raised an eyebrow in disbelieve as he cradled the smaller males face tenderly in his hands and left a peck on his mouth. ''Of course baby, you know that.'' he assured softly but Jjong let out a snort and frowned. ''Do I?'' His face screaming doubt while he looked away ashamed and upset.

 

They were in a relationship and acted like a married couple most of the time so Jonghyun feeling doubt about their love, shocked Jinki a little.

 

''Where does this come from?'' Jinki asked confused and felt anger well up in him. Something happened that caused Jjong to doubt Jinki's love for him and he didn't like that at all. ''Are you kidding me?'' he blurted out.

 

Jonghyun jerked his head out of Jinkis hands and rubbed his eyes furiously, ''No I'm not! You're always hanging out with Joon and you're always touching each other,'' He began and glared at him with so much hurt that it left Jinki speechless. ''Just this evening, you leave to congratulate him and you didn't return for over an hour!'' he growled as he paced up and down in front of Jinki.

 

''I tried to get over the fact that my lover is still hanging out with his ex-boyfriend but I'm suspicious about the way he acts... he is all over you and you let him!'' Jonghyun shouted and slammed his fist in frustration against the wall.

 

Jinki winced and stared at him, taking in what his lover said and sighed sadly. This hadn't been the first time that Jjong had been suspicious about Joons intentions.  
But it had never been this bad, with Jonghyun doubting Jinki's love for him. 

 

''Jjong, we might have left each other on good terms but that doesn't mean I still love him or he me...'' Jinki reasoned and walked up to the troubled man, grasping his wrists and pulling him close. He kissed the slender fingers, trying to relax the tense muscles.

 

Jonghyun decided to be difficult and he pushed Jinki away causing the other man to stumble backwards and stare at him dumbfounded. ''Are you sure he doesn't love you anymore? The way he looks at you and the way he touches you.., I don't trust him!'' he hissed before stomping off to their bedroom. His emotions getting too much for him that he wanted to be alone.

 

Jinki blinked and raced after Jonghyun, stopping him from locking himself in the bedroom. He wasn't going to sleep on the sofa, no way in hell. He whirled his lover around and grabbed him by the shoulders.

 

''Do you trust me?'' He asked his boyfriend, fearing the worst.

 

Jonghyun looked up in dismay, caught off guard by Jinki's question. He locked eyes with him briefly before gazing away with a small nod. Jinki breathed a sigh of relief as he pulled the smaller male closer. He tilted his lovers chin up with a finger and pressed a small kiss on his button-like nose.

 

''Jjong, I love _you_ with all my heart, my future is with you and not with Joon,'' he declared passionately as he wrapped his arms around the smaller man's waist and held him close. ''Joon knows very well that you are my light in the darkness, the moon to my sun... You make me feel things I never felt for Joon.'' he assured the composer and grinned as he heard a small sob and felt slender arms wrap around his middle tightly.

 

Jinki squeezed him and lifted one hand to stroke golden blond hair as he took in the feeling of love and affection for the smaller male. Jjong always acted confident around friends but his family and those closest too him knew that he was less secure than he looked. Jonghyun nearly soaked his shirt as he let out all his frustration and sadness from this evening. The older man whispered soothingly in his ear as he clutched his lover to his chest, comforting him the best he could.

 

Eventually, the smaller male pushed away slightly and pressed a shy kiss against Jinki's chin. ''I-I'm sorry.'' He apologized, suddenly feeling ashamed for his attitude tonight.  
Jinki just squeezed him with an understanding smile. ''It's okay baby, but what brought this on?''.

 

Jonghyun swallowed nervously and his brown eyes drifted to the buttons of his lovers' shirt as he played with it. ''K-Kibum was at the p-party,'' he started and bit his lip, ''He told me how his relationship ended badly with Woohyun since he caught him cheating with his ex.''

 

Jinki closed his eyes and rested his chin on the blond's head.

 

''He said that he trusted you to not do the same, ''Jonghyun continued, “but as we looked over, Joon had his arm around you and it suddenly scared me.'' he admitted and nuzzled his lover while tightening his hold on the other's waist.  
  


''I love you so much, I can't be without you,'' Jonghyun confessed honestly. ''I do trust you, with all my heart, I would follow you to the end of the earth, you mean so much too me because you give me confidence when I feel insecure, you're the first person outside my family that found the real me past the wall I had built around me...'' He babbled as he pulled away and pressed a warm hand against Jinki's soft cheek tenderly.

 

''I'll try to be good for you but sometimes I'm afraid that you might have some... lingering feelings for Joon and that you get tired of my insecurity.” Jonghyun sniffled and bit his lip as he locked eyes again with his lover.

 

Jinki gazed back at him with so much affection, love shining brightly in his chocolate eyes. He placed his hands on the younger man's hips and swooped down to press their lips together. The kiss was light before Jinki nuzzled his lover's nose. ''I will never get tired of you, I love you for who you are. You are insecure for which I don't blame you, but you have so many wonderful qualities,'' he assured his lover.  
  
  
''You take care of everyone who holds a place in your heart, the love you have for music always leaves me baffled because whenever you have inspiration, you compose masterpieces!'' he said earnestly and grinned warmly as he saw his lover blush. ''Not only that but the little things you do...massaging my shoulders when I had a hard day at work, your cuddles and soothing singing voice when I feel lonely, the way you snuggle and wiggle in my arms as we get ready for sleep...” Jinki chuckled a little breathless while Jonghyun swatted at him, blushing madly and wiggling shyly in his hold.

 

''I love you Jonghyun,'' His honey-like voice made Jonghyun all warm and fluttery inside. The smaller male wrapped his arms around his handsome and wonderful boyfriend with a happy sniffle. ''I love you too Jinki,'' he whispered affectionately.

 

They stood in the hall, holding each other close, the argument about Joon forgotten as they basked in each others love.

 

Jinki hesitatingly pulled away and guided his lover to the living room, where he plopped down on the sofa and spread his arms for Jonghyun to fall in too. The composer fell in his arms and snuggled as Jinki's arms wrapped around him, spreading warmth across his lower back.

   
Jonghyun stuck out his tongue as Jinki smothered his face with kisses, ''My pure little princess,'' Jinki teased light-heartedly.

  
They both giggled as Jonghyun slapped his shoulder, leave it to Jinki to lift the mood with a bit of teasing. The smaller male didn't mind and ended up capturing his lover's lips in a breathless kiss and as they continued to rest on the sofa, Jonghyun could only think about how strong and secure Jinki made him feel and how much he cherished the other.

 

 

**Author's Note:**

> Happy Ending!! Jongyu forever ♥  
> Thanks for reading! 
> 
> A special thank you to my Beta Reader Doylebaby ♥


End file.
